Faith like a Child

This month is Childhood Cancer Awareness month. This month there will be walks, runs, and ceremonies held to honor and remember those children who have fought this terrible disease. You will see commercials on TV featuring these children. One of the specialities I have thought about going into is Pediatric Oncology. I am inspired by the resilience these children show in their fight. Their families challenge me in my faith. I feel called to help those in their most desperate time of need. While I'm not sure yet if pediatric oncology is the speciality God has called me to,  these families still hold a special place in  my heart.

I'm sure many of you have know a child or family who has been touched by childhood cancer. I know two. I've written about their mother's before, but today I would like to share more of their story. Over the past year these families have demonstrated their faith in God and love for each other. I have grown in my faith by watching these families struggle through this journey. Here is their story.

The story begins August 3, 2010. Richard Lee, 3 years old,  was diagnosed with a Wilms Tumor. A Wilms Tumor is a kidney tumor in young children. It usually found in children around age 3. Richard Lee's parents bought him to the emergency room because he had not being feeling well. They left with a cancer diagnosis. They discovered that the cancer had spread to his abdomen and lungs. Over the next 9 days Richard Lee would undergo surgery to remove his kidney and to put in a port for his chemo treatments. He would also begin receiving his first treatments. Over the next several months he would undergo radiation and chemo treatments. Our church rallied around his family and his family called on the Lord. Over the next year I would see an amazing example of what it means to have faith in God. His mother, Nancy, choose to rejoice in God no matter what each day brought. She rejoiced eat day she got to spend with her son and her other children. She said that each day was a gift from God. This really challenged me in my own walk with the Lord. There were many days when school was tough and I would find myself complaining. After seeing this example in Nancy I decided to do the same. I choose to see each day as a gift from God. I choose to rejoice in the day that He had given me to matter what happened.

Andrew was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia on June 2, 2011. ALL is the most common form of childhood leukemia. Andrew has a favorable type. Andrew had a port placed and began chemo. I babysat Andrew since he was a baby. I'm very close with his mother Amy. Amy and her husband Warren were leaders in the youth group when I was a teenager. Amy has been a mentor of mine for years and has become a very close friend and sister in Christ. A friend called and told me about Andrew and I immediately headed to the Children's hospital at St. Francis. When Amy opened the door and saw me standing there, she said she wasn't surprised to see me. It was an amazing experience for me to be able to minister to this sweet friend of mine. It was like things had been reversed. Yet in those moments while Amy needed to be ministered to, she continued to minister to my heart. She told me she didn't know what the future held, but she knew that the Lord was in control. Throughout the summer Andrew was in and out of the hospital for fevers. He was able to start 4th grade and spend some time in class before becoming a homebound student for awhile. Andrew continues with his treatment. His treatment will go on for the next 3 years.

Andrew and Richard Lee's families were very close before their boys became sick. They have remained close and ministered to each other in this time of need. The families have chosen to put God first in their lives. They are raising boys that know that God is in control. The have chosen to walk by faith. They don't know what the future holds for them or their boys, but they do know that the lives of RIchard Lee and Andrew are in God's hands. While in the hospital last August, Richard Lee said "God made me special." Those are sweet words to hear from a three year old. You see Richard Lee gets it, God made him special, just like God makes all of us special. Children have a special place in God's heart. When children came to Jesus the disciples tried to make them leave, but Jesus told them to let the children come to Him. Isaiah 11is a prophecy about the coming of the Messiah. It says that a little child will lead them. All though this passage specifically speaks of Christ's coming, it has application to our lives. Jesus said that the kingdom belonged to the Children. He went on to say that you have to have the faith of a child to enter the kingdom of Heaven. When Christ said this he didn't mean that we don't grow up in our faith, but he is referring to the blind faith that children have. Children will believe what you tell them. They don't seek for you to prove to it them. In our society many people want a scientific experiment to prove the existence of God. The faith of a child is one of the sweetest things. Today my challenge is that you have the faith of a child. The faith that can say God made me special when you don't feel special. Faith that can withstand the wind, rain, and storms that come.

"God made me special"

Richard Lee

If you are interested in helping fight childhood cancer here are some events that are happening this month:
1. Join me and Richard Lee and Andrew's families this Saturday as we walk for CureSearch. CureSearch is a nationwide program that works with current pediatric oncology research. We are walking to raise money for this. Registration starts at 8am by Memorial High School. Here's the website for more info:  http://blba.us/i.asp?id=476447
-334350937-1

2. This next Monday September 26, Chili's will be donating all the profit for the day to St, Jude's Research Hospital. You can also visit chilis.com for more information on how to donate to St. Jude

In Christ there are no Underdogs

Last night in my quite time I was reading the story of David and Goliath. David was just a teenager. He was small compared to Goliath and had no official warrior training. But David didn't need warrior training, God had prepared David for the task of defeating Goliath for many years. David had fought against wild animals to keep his father's sheep safe. But more important than David's experience as a shepard, David trusted in God. David knew that his power didn't lie in himself, but in God. David knew that although he may not be big enough in his own strength to defeat the giant, he could defeat Goliath through the strength that the Lord gave him. On that day David wanted to show all of Israel and the Philistines that his God was the God that saved.

Many times in my life I struggle with being confident. You see I know that the Lord has called me to be a doctor, but at times I struggle with turning complete control of this over to the Lord. During undergrad there were times I stressed and worried about getting into med school. The Lord keep reminding me that He has called me to this, to do my part study hard, and that He was going to see that He accomplished this in me. The Lord continues to remind me of this everyday. This month I'm working in a clinic in Mannford. This is the first rotation that I've been making physical diagnoses and working with making a plan for my patients.  Last week I was really nervous to say what I thought the patient might I have. I was really hard on myself. I know that this is suppose to be a learning experience and I don't have to have all the answers, but I also know that the Lord has blessed me with the knowledge to arrive at answers. I am reminded each day that the Lord will accomplish this task in me.

 You see many times I feel like David facing Goliath, but I'm not as quick as David was to claim the power of God like David did. I'm sure many of you face your own giants each day. I think that many times as women we struggle with being confident in ourselves. I'm not talking about being prideful, but being confident with the gifts, talents, and passions the Lord has given you. God has blessed each and everyone of you with something special. As Christians the Lord has called us all to something, whether it be a homemaker, a teacher, a doctor, a lawyer...I could go on but I think you get the idea. He desires for us to use the gifts, talents and passions He has given us. Part of being strong women, is being confident in ourselves. In Christ there is no underdog. Through Christ, we are able to be strong. The deceiver tries to limit us and tell us that we are not good enough so that we don't accomplish the will of God in our lives, but we have the power of Christ. In our battle against our giants of doubt, fear, and unworthiness, our weapon is the power of the Lord God Almighty.

"David said to the Philistine, ‘You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied'"

1 Samuel 17:45

So ladies in our struggle to have confidence in ourselves, we have the power of Christ, but we also have each other. Strong women have to stick together. It is vital that we encourage our sisters in Christ to be Stout Women. Today's devotional was about David and Jonathan. When you think about friendships in the bible I'm sure one story that comes to mind is that of David and Jonathan. David and Jonathan had a deep bond. Jonathan realized that the Lord had chosen David to have the throne and Jonathan accepted that. Jonathan saved David's life from Saul, when could have easily had David killed and taken the throne from himself. David returned the favor by brining Jonathan's son into his home after Jonathan was killed. This friendship flourished because both of these men had a relationship with the Lord. These are the types of relationships we need to build as women. A British publication had a contest to find who could come up with the best definition of a friend. Here are the top five responses:

•             "one who multiplies joy, divides grief, and whose honesty is inviolable"

•             "one who understands our silence"

•             "A volume of sympathy bound in cloth"

•             "A watch that  beats true for all time and never runs down"

•             And the winning definition: " a friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out"

Do you have someone who is there when no one else is? I'm sure some of you have spouses who are there like that, but do you also have another woman who is there for you when no one else is. I challenge you to have a friend who's stands by you through thick and thin. Do you have someone who will inspire you to once again have confidence in yourself when you don't? Do you have that friend who challenges you to be a Stout woman that is brave, bold, determined, obstinate, uncompromising, sturdy, vigorous, staunch, enduring?

" Being confident of this that He who began a good work in you, will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" 

Philippians 1:6

Seize the Day

I was sitting in Mr. Coughlin's Old Testament class at Bishop Kelley and Mr. O'Brien (now Fr. O'Brien) came in and whispered something to my teacher. Mr Coughlin turned the TV on and told us that 2 planes had flown into the World Trade Center in New York City. In disbelief, we as the towers fell. We then went to an all school mass, where the principal told the whole school what happened. I don't remember learning much in school that day. We watched the news in several classes. I do remember ending football practice with one of the seniors Tony Scardino leading us in prayer. Tony sat out his senior year in football to rehab his knee injury so he could join the Marines. For the rest of the games that season Tony lead the team onto the field carrying an American flag.

Where were you on that day? What were you doing? This next week marks the 10th anniversary of 9/11, a day that forever changed us.  The next year would prove to be a difficult year for many people. Many struggled with grief over losing a loved one in the attacks. Many struggled with survivors guilt wondering why their life had been spared. Most of us were scared at what the future held. The first year following 9/11 would prove to be a trying year for me, but in a different way.

Our church like many others opened their doors that Tuesday evening for a time of prayer. For myself and many others at church this would not be the last time that we gathered in that sanctuary for prayer. Shortly after the attack on the World Trade Center, my youth minister Andy was diagnosed with Leukemia. He began treatment in January 2002. Andy reminded our youth group the night before his treatment began that God has a plan for our lives. He shared Jeremiah 29:11 with his. He told us that he was not scared about what the future held, because he knew that God was in control. In May of 2002, Andy was not doing well. Again the church opened its doors one night. Our youth group and other church members came to the church to pray. We prayed and begged God that He would see Andy through the night, and he did. On May 28, 2002, God called Andy home. It was so hard for our youth group, we so longed for an earthly healing, but God had a bigger and better plan. He brought Andy complete and total healing in the next life. God continued to use Andy. Andy had challenged us to bring an unsaved friend to summer camp. Many students did and people came to know the Lord because their friend invited them to summer camp. Most of all Andy taught us a life lesson that is hard for us to understand. Andy taught us about trusting in God for everything. He challenged us not worry about our future, because God has a plan and His plan is perfect. Andy was a godly man who trusted in the Lord with all his heart.

"For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future"

Jeremiah 29:11

Life has changed a lot since 9/11/01. There are many things that have become the "norm". I am moved by the first responders that ran to the buildings that day while everyone else ran away. We have seen men and women continue to serve in the military past original contracts as well as men and women join after 9/11 with the nation at war. But what inspires me the most, is the stories of the everyday people just living life. The Todd Beamers and those who helped him over power the terrorists on United Flight 93. These men and women inspire us to not accept defeat, to not allow the terrorists to rule our lives, and to do something. They inspire us to serve our communities and each other, may their sacrifice not be in vain.

So I challenge you this next week, to serve others and reach out to your neighbor. May we honor those who gave their lives to save others by do something for the greater good. May we honor the memory of everyone who lost their lives that day by laying aside our political backgrounds and uniting as Americans to remember. May we honor the men and women of the military by flaming the patriotism that was so evident in the days following 9/11. Fly your flags. Hold a door open for someone. Smile at someone you pass on the street. Buy a co-worker or friend lunch just because.  Don't rush through your day. Take time to be thankful for the freedom and safety we enjoy. Spend time with your family. Hug your children. Don't waste your life. Seize the day. Live in the moment. Take risks. Always be thankful for each day you have.

"Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being. With freedom comes responsibility. For the person who is unwilling to grow up, the person who does not want to carry is own weight, this is a frightening prospect"

Eleanor Roosevelt

"Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same."
Ronald Reagan

"The momentum of freedom in our world is unmistakable - and it is not carried forward by our power alone. We can trust in that greater power Who guides the unfolding of the years. And in all that is to come, we can know that His purposes are just and true."

George W. Bush

"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other."

Mother Teresa

"And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country. "

John F. Kennedy

His Timing, not ours

Okay, so I usually don't have time to have two posts in 1 week, especially lately, but I got the following email from my brother Stephen and I wanted to share. As many of you know Stephen was in a terrible accident about a year and a half ago. The Lord continues to use this experience to teach us of his incredible timing and providence.


Here's the e-mail:
Brad just introduced me to a long time friend of his, Dennis Cagwin.  He and Dennis were eating lunch today and got to talking about auto accidents.  Dennis began telling Brad about an accident he witnessed where he was one of the first on the scene.  As he started telling the story, Brad realized the accident was mine.  It turns out, Dennis is one of the two whose names is on the police report.  He was behind me and saw everything transpire.  He said I was in the far left inside lane going around the curve.  Traffic was slowing down in the left and middle lane so I moved across those two lanes to the right hand lane.  However, a semitruck had stalled.  He said I had only about 15 feet to stop before I hit the truck.  He was in the middle lane and came to a stop right beside me.  He said a man got into my car before he did.  Dennis called 911.  He asked the man in the car if I was alive so he could tell 911.  That man got out of my car and left, and Dennis went and got in my back seat and talked to me until the fire truck arrived.  He said he just told me it was going to be okay and tried to keep me awake.  He said the firetruck got there in like 2.5 minutes.  He said they had me on the way to the hospital in 25 minutes.  He said he was impressed with how well the firemen worked.  He said one time a sawzaw battery went out and another was right there with one to replace it.  He said my seat was upright, and the back of the truck was right in my chest.  He said my face was just flat and my teeth were pushed back.  He said the only way he could tell I was alive was when they put the oxygen mask on my face he saw it fog up and then go away.  He said he texted his wife when he saw that to tell her "He is alive".  His truck was trapped in the traffic and so he sat in his car and watched the firemen cut me out.  He said he asked the firemen how he could find out if I was alright, and they told him there was no way to do so.  He told me he was so glad that I am alive.  He gave me his business card and said he wanted to go to lunch some time.  Brad said Dennis is a big Jesus guy and told him I was too, so he wanted us to meet.  He said they have been friends for 15 years or so.


Brad is Stephen's boss at HICORP.  On Wednesday we will celebrate Stephen's 30th birthday. Tonight we had a surprise birthday party for my brother. This morning my mom and I picked up the cake from a family friend and we told her the story about Stephen's e-mail. Her eyes filled with tears. She said she was just happy to be able to make Stephen's birthday cake. It made all of a little teary eyed. It reminded me of how good God is. I've been talking about new beginnings a lot lately on here. God gave Stephen a new outlook on life after his accident. He enjoys sharing his story and living for God's plans in his life.  I'm so happy that I get to celebrate this birthday with my brother. 

Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God. Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart. I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming God's Message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears

Philippians 1:3-6 (The Message)

All Things New

As I mentioned in last week's blog I'm driving to Muskogee everyday for my psych rotations. As I've mentioned last week I've been using my mornings to pray and reflect. I've really enjoyed my morning time just me and God driving down the road. It prepares me for the day ahead and the challenges that I may face. Last week in choir I mentioned to the ladies during prayer time that the drive was really getting to me and I was getting worn out by driving to Muskogee everyday. They encouraged me to spend this time in prayer. While I had been using the first few minutes of my drive to pray I had yet to use the entire drive to pray and worship the Lord as I drove. I decided to take their advice. So for the last week I've been praying and worshiping the Lord. 

Again this morning I was watching the sunrise as I drove. It was beautiful this morning. This morning I was listening to Watermark's All Things New. If you've never heard this song, you should listen to it on youtube. In the chorus its says that "because of who You are and who I am in You, You make all things New." Again I was reminded that God is the one that makes everything new. This was so encouraging this morning. It has been a long week on the psych unit. We have had several patients that are really sick and I have worked hard. This was so encouraging to hear this morning that because God is who He is and that He loves us He makes things new. The Bible talks about how God makes us new. We have the promise of not only a new life in Christ on this earth, but new life in Christ when we die. 

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come The old has gone, the new is here! 

2nd Corinthians 5:17

So many times as Christians, especially as women we forget that we have been created new in Christ. We have new beginnings. As women sometimes, we tend to dwell on our "imperfections," the things in our lives that are unbecoming that we don't take pride in. While it is important to be repentant of our sins we tend to think less of ourselves. We hide who we truly are.  Ladies, you are beautiful on the inside and outside. God has a special plan for your life. He plans to use your flaws, imperfections, and things that you just don't like about yourself. He desires to take the the hurts and bruises from life and turn them into a beautiful masterpiece if we will only will trust Him with out. 

You see stout woman aren't afraid to be made into new beautiful masterpieces. They aren't afraid to be vulnerable before their Lord.  I think of the story of the woman at the well. This Samaritan woman is a perfect example of how Christ makes things new. Let me "sarahpharse" the story. Jesus and his disciples had been out ministering to others and sharing the Good News. They stopped in Samaria. To the Jews, Samaria was where "those people, those sinners" lived. The disciples went into town and Jesus waited at the well. This woman (one of those people) came to draw some water and Jesus asked for some. She knew that Jesus was a Jew and Jews didn't talk with her "kind." Long story short Jesus shared with her how he could change her life. That He and only He could take away her sins and make her new. I believe Jesus was also saying to this woman, "be My daughter, be the daughter of The King, let me make you new, let me take your imperfections, your "beauty flaws" and your hurts and make you into a beautiful masterpiece.  Now I know that not all of our stories are just like hers. But we just like are filled with our own hidden sins, flaws, and hurts and we just liked that woman need to answer Christ's call...to be the daughter of a King. 

For you created my inmost being you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,  I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body;    all the days ordained for me were written in your book    before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them,they would outnumber the grains of sands when I awake, I am still with you.

Psalms 139:13-18

Sunrises and Harvests

This month I'm traveling to Muskogee everyday for my psych rotation. I leave Tulsa about 630 in the morning. I get to watch the sunrise every morning. If you don't know this Oklahoma has some of the most beautiful sunrises. Everyday sunrise is different. I enjoy watching the sunrises every morning. It is a great way to start my day. It is a worshipful and relaxing time to watch the sunrise. It really prepares me for my day. Just as each day begins with a new sunrise, each day is new for us and comes with new opportunities. It reminds me that even if we made mistakes or go through trials the day before we have a new day to try again.

I'm reminded of Ruth. Ruth is my favorite woman in the bible. I know I've mentioned her before. Ruth had moved to Bethlehem with her mother-in-law after her husband died. Both Ruth and Naomi were in mourning over their husbands' death when the arrived. The last verse in the first chapter of Ruth says that they arrived just as the harvest was beginning. The harvest is a sign of new life and new beginnings, just like the sunrises I watch every morning.

We are given new life in Christ when we become Christians. We are given an everlasting life, free from sin and death like I talked about last week. God knows we aren't perfect and that even as Christians we are human and have sinful nature, so in his infinite mercy He gives us new beginnings when we make mistakes.

Sunrises also remind us that a new day is coming. As Christians we are not free from the trials of life. But we do have a heavenly Father that is with us every step of the way. It can be pretty dark in the mornings when I leave. The sunrises usually start with rays of sun coming through the clouds and breaking the darkness. This reminds me that sometimes in our trials we don't think we can see the end but God starts to show us His light at just the right time.

I would like to conclude my writing briefly about two "Stout" women who live their life looking for the sunrises and believing in new life, new beginnings, and new days. My friends Amy and Nancy from church have been great examples of faith to me over the last year. Last August Nancy's 3 year old son was diagnosed with a Wilms tumor. Over the past year Nancy has chosen to trust God for His mercy, she has chosen to praise the Lord and let others know that her son's life is in God's hands. She has inspired me to do the same. Amy has been a mentor and friend for years. Her son was diagnosed with Leukemia in May. She  has chosen to seek the Lords face and trust in Him for her son's care. I'm honored to call these ladies friends and mentors.

So this week look for the Sunrises in your life. Do you have new life in Christ? Do see the ways God gives you new beginnings? Do see the sun breaking through the clouds of your life?

So Naomi returned from Moab accompanied by Ruth the Moabite, her daughter-in-law, arriving in Bethlehem as the barley harvest was beginning 

Ruth 1:22

Home of the Free because of the Brave Part 2: Freedom is not Free

As I was driving home yesterday from work, I drove through Porter, Oklahoma. It was refreshing to see the American flag flying from porches and in front yards. It reminded me of a time right after 9-11 you would pass through neighborhoods and see the flag flying. It was refreshing to see people be patriotic. Last Friday the American military suffered its greatest lost in the Afghan wars since it began in 2001. 30 members of the military were killed when there helicopter was shot down. These men were headed to help Army rangers in a fight against the Taliban. Across Oklahoma flags fly at half-staff to honor the men Oklahomans' have lost in Afghanistan. Last week we lost 4 Oklahoma soldiers from the 45th Infantry Division.  The events of the last week remind me that freedom is not free. Our freedom as Americans was brought with a price. We are able to say that we live in the land of the free because of the men and women that have fought for our country and because same gave the ultimate sacrifice. As Americans we should remember the 30 lost last week, but let us not forget to remember those who continue to give the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom. I challenge those that have a flag to fly it in honor of military this week and in memory of those who give the ultimate sacrifice to keep us safe.

In the same way that our freedom as Americans is not free we must remember that we are offered freedom in Christ and this freedom is not free. This freedom from sin and death was bought with a price. It was bought with the blood of Christ on the cross. Throughout the old testament they had to offer blood sacrifices to cover the people's sins. With Christ's death on the cross we no longer have to offer blood sacrifices to cover our sins. Christ made the ultimate sacrifice on Calvary so that we could have ultimate freedom. This freedom that is better than the freedom we have as Americans. It is a freedom that can be universal to all who accept. Freedom to have eternal life through Christ.

"It is for Freedom that Christ set us Free. Stand firm, then and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of Slavery" 

Galatians 5:1