Strong and Courageous

"We don't have to carry, adopt, or raise children in order to qualify as spiritual mothers. Instead, we only need to display a willingness to use the gifts that God has entrusted to us in order to nurture others and strengthen others in their faith. "

~ Anonymous 

I recently read the story of Jael and Deborah in the Judges 4-5. I've never head of Jael before. When Deborah served as a judge for the national of Israel, a group of Israelites tried to rebel against the nation and take over. The leader of this group was a man named Sisera. Deborah told another man named Barak that the Lord had ordered him to pursue Sisera, but Barak wouldn't go without Deborah, so she went. She told Barak, however, because she was going that he would not get the honor over stopping the rebellion, but that the Lord would hand Sisera over to a woman. Meanwhile, as Sisera fled he came to the tent of a woman named Jael. Jael knew that her husband was a member of the group causing the rebellion, because Sisera had come their to seek shelter. While he was in her home, she killed him because she knew he was causing rebellion against the Lord.


In a moment Jael, had to make a decision, would she side with her husband who was in sin rebelling against the Lord, or would she obey God and not provide shelter and safety to Sisera. In Judges 5, we read Deborah's, song, in which she gives praise to Jael saying that she is blessed among women for her decision. Judges 5 ends with saying that they had peace for forty years.


Judges 4-5 gives us a glimpse of two women who acted courageously and helped save the nation of Israel from destruction by enemies from within. There is much to be learned from Jael and Deborah, as women we are called to be courageous just like they were. These women used the gifts God blessed them with to fight their battles and to stand for their beliefs. Our society today needs women that will stand for what is right, that will fight for lost souls, and that will minister to those that are hurting.


Elisabeth Elliot is a modern example of  a courageous woman. Ms. Elliot lost her husband Jim while he was on mission to South America. Jim and four other men had flown to a village in South America to minister to a tribe that had never heard the name of Jesus. This tribe was known for the violence against "outsiders." Jim and his companions had contact with members of the tribe before, but when the came to set up the mission, they were attacked and killed. It is not known why the natives decided to kill these men. Later Elisabeth Elliot and the other widows of the men that were killed traveled to the very same village to minister to the men who had killed their husbands. There are stories of how she ministered to the very men that killed her husband and how these men and their families came to know Jesus. Elisabeth Elliot teaches that through dark times and trials God is still glorified. She choose to forgive and minister to those who took her husband from her leaving her a widow and a single mom. She ministered to the women of the Auca Indian Tribe. Now this particular tribe in South America is no longer a tribe that has never heard the name of Jesus, but a tribe that not only knows, but loves Jesus. 

“I have one desire now - to live a life of reckless abandon for the Lord, putting all my energy and strength into it.” 

~ Elisabeth Elliot

God calls us as women to be ministers of his gospel in many of the same ways that Elisabeth Elliot ministered to the Auca Tribe. I was recently reading in a commentary in my bible that talked about spiritual motherhood. In this commentary over Deborah it talked about how we don't have to be earthly mothers to be spiritual mothers. You see God has made women to be nurturing, caregivers, who compassionately love those around us. Not that being a nurturing care-give is a bad thing, in fact I believe that is part of what God calls us as women to be, but that is not the end all be all of his purpose in our lives. You see Elisabeth Elliot didn't just sit to the side passively being a quiet woman. She boldly shared the gospel with those who needed to hear it the most. In the 1950's it wasn't proper for a single woman to travel like she did. She was told to stay in the states and minister to those here. She decided to act on faith in God and fight for the lost souls of the men and women of the Auca tribe. We need more Christian women that will rise up and take a stand. We need women like Deborah that will be brave, even when the men around them refuse. We need to be women of courage that fight for families, our friends, and those that we don't know to Christ come to the knowledge of saving grace in Christ Jesus. Women, God has created you to be strong, to be courageous, and to stand for what is right. God wants us to minister and mentor those women who are younger than us. It is  through our example as Christian women that the young Christian girls will grow to be strong Christian women. We need to seek out mentors, strong Christian women who are actively fighting for lost souls everyday, women who are courageous and not afraid to use the gifts God has given them. We need women who are not afraid to act in faith even when no one else will.

“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." 

~ Jim Elliot

“The will of God is not something you add to your life. It’s a course you choose. You either line yourself up with the Son of God…or you capitulate to the principle which governs the rest of the world.”
~ Elisabeth Elliot

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:9

In Search of Shalom

‎"to promote life not death, health not sickness, to suffer and counsel with those who suffer, to care compassionately when one cannot cure, to be a part of God's presence in the valley of the shadow of death, in short to search for shalom" 

Hessel Bouma III

I first read this quote as a freshmen at OBU. We read a book called on Moral Medicine in our Biology Colloquium class. This book was a collection of essays dealing with various aspects of ethical issues we face in medicine. I don't remember a lot about this particular article, but I remember this quote. When I read this quote I thought it symbolized the reasons I wanted to become a doctor. This quote continues to remind me of why I have chosen this profession. I had an extremely rough day yesterday. We had a young child come into the ER severely injured and we had to life flight him out. Yesterday this quote came to mind as I was thinking about the events of yesterday afternoon and evening. As the boy was wheeled out I was able to put my arms around the boy's arm and try and comfort her. Today we found out that this boy was miraculously alive. Through yesterday's sadness and other events this week I am reminded of the opportunity I have to minister to my patients and their families.    

As Christians we are called to live of lives like this as well. We are to be God's hands and feet. We need to find ways to minister to our friends, family and co-workers who are struggling. We need to promote life, Life through Christ. We are called to weep with our brothers and sisters when they are struggling. Nothing ministers more to people that a Christian who knows, hope and life coming alongside of someone who is suffering. 

Traditionally Shalom is thought to mean peace, while it does mean peace it means much more than that. Shalom comes front he verb, shalom which means, complete, perfect, and full. It also is related to the Hebrew word, Shelem, which means to pay for and Shulam which means fully paid. As Christians, our sin has been paid in full by the blood of Christ. The bible tells us that God gives us peace that surpasses all understanding. I challenge you today to search for Shalom in your life and in the lives of other people. The peace that we are given as Christians makes us complete, fully and lacking in nothing. 

Faith like a Child

This month is Childhood Cancer Awareness month. This month there will be walks, runs, and ceremonies held to honor and remember those children who have fought this terrible disease. You will see commercials on TV featuring these children. One of the specialities I have thought about going into is Pediatric Oncology. I am inspired by the resilience these children show in their fight. Their families challenge me in my faith. I feel called to help those in their most desperate time of need. While I'm not sure yet if pediatric oncology is the speciality God has called me to,  these families still hold a special place in  my heart.

I'm sure many of you have know a child or family who has been touched by childhood cancer. I know two. I've written about their mother's before, but today I would like to share more of their story. Over the past year these families have demonstrated their faith in God and love for each other. I have grown in my faith by watching these families struggle through this journey. Here is their story.

The story begins August 3, 2010. Richard Lee, 3 years old,  was diagnosed with a Wilms Tumor. A Wilms Tumor is a kidney tumor in young children. It usually found in children around age 3. Richard Lee's parents bought him to the emergency room because he had not being feeling well. They left with a cancer diagnosis. They discovered that the cancer had spread to his abdomen and lungs. Over the next 9 days Richard Lee would undergo surgery to remove his kidney and to put in a port for his chemo treatments. He would also begin receiving his first treatments. Over the next several months he would undergo radiation and chemo treatments. Our church rallied around his family and his family called on the Lord. Over the next year I would see an amazing example of what it means to have faith in God. His mother, Nancy, choose to rejoice in God no matter what each day brought. She rejoiced eat day she got to spend with her son and her other children. She said that each day was a gift from God. This really challenged me in my own walk with the Lord. There were many days when school was tough and I would find myself complaining. After seeing this example in Nancy I decided to do the same. I choose to see each day as a gift from God. I choose to rejoice in the day that He had given me to matter what happened.

Andrew was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia on June 2, 2011. ALL is the most common form of childhood leukemia. Andrew has a favorable type. Andrew had a port placed and began chemo. I babysat Andrew since he was a baby. I'm very close with his mother Amy. Amy and her husband Warren were leaders in the youth group when I was a teenager. Amy has been a mentor of mine for years and has become a very close friend and sister in Christ. A friend called and told me about Andrew and I immediately headed to the Children's hospital at St. Francis. When Amy opened the door and saw me standing there, she said she wasn't surprised to see me. It was an amazing experience for me to be able to minister to this sweet friend of mine. It was like things had been reversed. Yet in those moments while Amy needed to be ministered to, she continued to minister to my heart. She told me she didn't know what the future held, but she knew that the Lord was in control. Throughout the summer Andrew was in and out of the hospital for fevers. He was able to start 4th grade and spend some time in class before becoming a homebound student for awhile. Andrew continues with his treatment. His treatment will go on for the next 3 years.

Andrew and Richard Lee's families were very close before their boys became sick. They have remained close and ministered to each other in this time of need. The families have chosen to put God first in their lives. They are raising boys that know that God is in control. The have chosen to walk by faith. They don't know what the future holds for them or their boys, but they do know that the lives of RIchard Lee and Andrew are in God's hands. While in the hospital last August, Richard Lee said "God made me special." Those are sweet words to hear from a three year old. You see Richard Lee gets it, God made him special, just like God makes all of us special. Children have a special place in God's heart. When children came to Jesus the disciples tried to make them leave, but Jesus told them to let the children come to Him. Isaiah 11is a prophecy about the coming of the Messiah. It says that a little child will lead them. All though this passage specifically speaks of Christ's coming, it has application to our lives. Jesus said that the kingdom belonged to the Children. He went on to say that you have to have the faith of a child to enter the kingdom of Heaven. When Christ said this he didn't mean that we don't grow up in our faith, but he is referring to the blind faith that children have. Children will believe what you tell them. They don't seek for you to prove to it them. In our society many people want a scientific experiment to prove the existence of God. The faith of a child is one of the sweetest things. Today my challenge is that you have the faith of a child. The faith that can say God made me special when you don't feel special. Faith that can withstand the wind, rain, and storms that come.

"God made me special"

Richard Lee

If you are interested in helping fight childhood cancer here are some events that are happening this month:
1. Join me and Richard Lee and Andrew's families this Saturday as we walk for CureSearch. CureSearch is a nationwide program that works with current pediatric oncology research. We are walking to raise money for this. Registration starts at 8am by Memorial High School. Here's the website for more info:  http://blba.us/i.asp?id=476447
-334350937-1

2. This next Monday September 26, Chili's will be donating all the profit for the day to St, Jude's Research Hospital. You can also visit chilis.com for more information on how to donate to St. Jude

In Christ there are no Underdogs

Last night in my quite time I was reading the story of David and Goliath. David was just a teenager. He was small compared to Goliath and had no official warrior training. But David didn't need warrior training, God had prepared David for the task of defeating Goliath for many years. David had fought against wild animals to keep his father's sheep safe. But more important than David's experience as a shepard, David trusted in God. David knew that his power didn't lie in himself, but in God. David knew that although he may not be big enough in his own strength to defeat the giant, he could defeat Goliath through the strength that the Lord gave him. On that day David wanted to show all of Israel and the Philistines that his God was the God that saved.

Many times in my life I struggle with being confident. You see I know that the Lord has called me to be a doctor, but at times I struggle with turning complete control of this over to the Lord. During undergrad there were times I stressed and worried about getting into med school. The Lord keep reminding me that He has called me to this, to do my part study hard, and that He was going to see that He accomplished this in me. The Lord continues to remind me of this everyday. This month I'm working in a clinic in Mannford. This is the first rotation that I've been making physical diagnoses and working with making a plan for my patients.  Last week I was really nervous to say what I thought the patient might I have. I was really hard on myself. I know that this is suppose to be a learning experience and I don't have to have all the answers, but I also know that the Lord has blessed me with the knowledge to arrive at answers. I am reminded each day that the Lord will accomplish this task in me.

 You see many times I feel like David facing Goliath, but I'm not as quick as David was to claim the power of God like David did. I'm sure many of you face your own giants each day. I think that many times as women we struggle with being confident in ourselves. I'm not talking about being prideful, but being confident with the gifts, talents, and passions the Lord has given you. God has blessed each and everyone of you with something special. As Christians the Lord has called us all to something, whether it be a homemaker, a teacher, a doctor, a lawyer...I could go on but I think you get the idea. He desires for us to use the gifts, talents and passions He has given us. Part of being strong women, is being confident in ourselves. In Christ there is no underdog. Through Christ, we are able to be strong. The deceiver tries to limit us and tell us that we are not good enough so that we don't accomplish the will of God in our lives, but we have the power of Christ. In our battle against our giants of doubt, fear, and unworthiness, our weapon is the power of the Lord God Almighty.

"David said to the Philistine, ‘You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied'"

1 Samuel 17:45

So ladies in our struggle to have confidence in ourselves, we have the power of Christ, but we also have each other. Strong women have to stick together. It is vital that we encourage our sisters in Christ to be Stout Women. Today's devotional was about David and Jonathan. When you think about friendships in the bible I'm sure one story that comes to mind is that of David and Jonathan. David and Jonathan had a deep bond. Jonathan realized that the Lord had chosen David to have the throne and Jonathan accepted that. Jonathan saved David's life from Saul, when could have easily had David killed and taken the throne from himself. David returned the favor by brining Jonathan's son into his home after Jonathan was killed. This friendship flourished because both of these men had a relationship with the Lord. These are the types of relationships we need to build as women. A British publication had a contest to find who could come up with the best definition of a friend. Here are the top five responses:

•             "one who multiplies joy, divides grief, and whose honesty is inviolable"

•             "one who understands our silence"

•             "A volume of sympathy bound in cloth"

•             "A watch that  beats true for all time and never runs down"

•             And the winning definition: " a friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out"

Do you have someone who is there when no one else is? I'm sure some of you have spouses who are there like that, but do you also have another woman who is there for you when no one else is. I challenge you to have a friend who's stands by you through thick and thin. Do you have someone who will inspire you to once again have confidence in yourself when you don't? Do you have that friend who challenges you to be a Stout woman that is brave, bold, determined, obstinate, uncompromising, sturdy, vigorous, staunch, enduring?

" Being confident of this that He who began a good work in you, will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" 

Philippians 1:6

Seize the Day

I was sitting in Mr. Coughlin's Old Testament class at Bishop Kelley and Mr. O'Brien (now Fr. O'Brien) came in and whispered something to my teacher. Mr Coughlin turned the TV on and told us that 2 planes had flown into the World Trade Center in New York City. In disbelief, we as the towers fell. We then went to an all school mass, where the principal told the whole school what happened. I don't remember learning much in school that day. We watched the news in several classes. I do remember ending football practice with one of the seniors Tony Scardino leading us in prayer. Tony sat out his senior year in football to rehab his knee injury so he could join the Marines. For the rest of the games that season Tony lead the team onto the field carrying an American flag.

Where were you on that day? What were you doing? This next week marks the 10th anniversary of 9/11, a day that forever changed us.  The next year would prove to be a difficult year for many people. Many struggled with grief over losing a loved one in the attacks. Many struggled with survivors guilt wondering why their life had been spared. Most of us were scared at what the future held. The first year following 9/11 would prove to be a trying year for me, but in a different way.

Our church like many others opened their doors that Tuesday evening for a time of prayer. For myself and many others at church this would not be the last time that we gathered in that sanctuary for prayer. Shortly after the attack on the World Trade Center, my youth minister Andy was diagnosed with Leukemia. He began treatment in January 2002. Andy reminded our youth group the night before his treatment began that God has a plan for our lives. He shared Jeremiah 29:11 with his. He told us that he was not scared about what the future held, because he knew that God was in control. In May of 2002, Andy was not doing well. Again the church opened its doors one night. Our youth group and other church members came to the church to pray. We prayed and begged God that He would see Andy through the night, and he did. On May 28, 2002, God called Andy home. It was so hard for our youth group, we so longed for an earthly healing, but God had a bigger and better plan. He brought Andy complete and total healing in the next life. God continued to use Andy. Andy had challenged us to bring an unsaved friend to summer camp. Many students did and people came to know the Lord because their friend invited them to summer camp. Most of all Andy taught us a life lesson that is hard for us to understand. Andy taught us about trusting in God for everything. He challenged us not worry about our future, because God has a plan and His plan is perfect. Andy was a godly man who trusted in the Lord with all his heart.

"For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future"

Jeremiah 29:11

Life has changed a lot since 9/11/01. There are many things that have become the "norm". I am moved by the first responders that ran to the buildings that day while everyone else ran away. We have seen men and women continue to serve in the military past original contracts as well as men and women join after 9/11 with the nation at war. But what inspires me the most, is the stories of the everyday people just living life. The Todd Beamers and those who helped him over power the terrorists on United Flight 93. These men and women inspire us to not accept defeat, to not allow the terrorists to rule our lives, and to do something. They inspire us to serve our communities and each other, may their sacrifice not be in vain.

So I challenge you this next week, to serve others and reach out to your neighbor. May we honor those who gave their lives to save others by do something for the greater good. May we honor the memory of everyone who lost their lives that day by laying aside our political backgrounds and uniting as Americans to remember. May we honor the men and women of the military by flaming the patriotism that was so evident in the days following 9/11. Fly your flags. Hold a door open for someone. Smile at someone you pass on the street. Buy a co-worker or friend lunch just because.  Don't rush through your day. Take time to be thankful for the freedom and safety we enjoy. Spend time with your family. Hug your children. Don't waste your life. Seize the day. Live in the moment. Take risks. Always be thankful for each day you have.

"Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being. With freedom comes responsibility. For the person who is unwilling to grow up, the person who does not want to carry is own weight, this is a frightening prospect"

Eleanor Roosevelt

"Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same."
Ronald Reagan

"The momentum of freedom in our world is unmistakable - and it is not carried forward by our power alone. We can trust in that greater power Who guides the unfolding of the years. And in all that is to come, we can know that His purposes are just and true."

George W. Bush

"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other."

Mother Teresa

"And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country. "

John F. Kennedy

His Timing, not ours

Okay, so I usually don't have time to have two posts in 1 week, especially lately, but I got the following email from my brother Stephen and I wanted to share. As many of you know Stephen was in a terrible accident about a year and a half ago. The Lord continues to use this experience to teach us of his incredible timing and providence.


Here's the e-mail:
Brad just introduced me to a long time friend of his, Dennis Cagwin.  He and Dennis were eating lunch today and got to talking about auto accidents.  Dennis began telling Brad about an accident he witnessed where he was one of the first on the scene.  As he started telling the story, Brad realized the accident was mine.  It turns out, Dennis is one of the two whose names is on the police report.  He was behind me and saw everything transpire.  He said I was in the far left inside lane going around the curve.  Traffic was slowing down in the left and middle lane so I moved across those two lanes to the right hand lane.  However, a semitruck had stalled.  He said I had only about 15 feet to stop before I hit the truck.  He was in the middle lane and came to a stop right beside me.  He said a man got into my car before he did.  Dennis called 911.  He asked the man in the car if I was alive so he could tell 911.  That man got out of my car and left, and Dennis went and got in my back seat and talked to me until the fire truck arrived.  He said he just told me it was going to be okay and tried to keep me awake.  He said the firetruck got there in like 2.5 minutes.  He said they had me on the way to the hospital in 25 minutes.  He said he was impressed with how well the firemen worked.  He said one time a sawzaw battery went out and another was right there with one to replace it.  He said my seat was upright, and the back of the truck was right in my chest.  He said my face was just flat and my teeth were pushed back.  He said the only way he could tell I was alive was when they put the oxygen mask on my face he saw it fog up and then go away.  He said he texted his wife when he saw that to tell her "He is alive".  His truck was trapped in the traffic and so he sat in his car and watched the firemen cut me out.  He said he asked the firemen how he could find out if I was alright, and they told him there was no way to do so.  He told me he was so glad that I am alive.  He gave me his business card and said he wanted to go to lunch some time.  Brad said Dennis is a big Jesus guy and told him I was too, so he wanted us to meet.  He said they have been friends for 15 years or so.


Brad is Stephen's boss at HICORP.  On Wednesday we will celebrate Stephen's 30th birthday. Tonight we had a surprise birthday party for my brother. This morning my mom and I picked up the cake from a family friend and we told her the story about Stephen's e-mail. Her eyes filled with tears. She said she was just happy to be able to make Stephen's birthday cake. It made all of a little teary eyed. It reminded me of how good God is. I've been talking about new beginnings a lot lately on here. God gave Stephen a new outlook on life after his accident. He enjoys sharing his story and living for God's plans in his life.  I'm so happy that I get to celebrate this birthday with my brother. 

Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God. Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart. I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming God's Message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears

Philippians 1:3-6 (The Message)

All Things New

As I mentioned in last week's blog I'm driving to Muskogee everyday for my psych rotations. As I've mentioned last week I've been using my mornings to pray and reflect. I've really enjoyed my morning time just me and God driving down the road. It prepares me for the day ahead and the challenges that I may face. Last week in choir I mentioned to the ladies during prayer time that the drive was really getting to me and I was getting worn out by driving to Muskogee everyday. They encouraged me to spend this time in prayer. While I had been using the first few minutes of my drive to pray I had yet to use the entire drive to pray and worship the Lord as I drove. I decided to take their advice. So for the last week I've been praying and worshiping the Lord. 

Again this morning I was watching the sunrise as I drove. It was beautiful this morning. This morning I was listening to Watermark's All Things New. If you've never heard this song, you should listen to it on youtube. In the chorus its says that "because of who You are and who I am in You, You make all things New." Again I was reminded that God is the one that makes everything new. This was so encouraging this morning. It has been a long week on the psych unit. We have had several patients that are really sick and I have worked hard. This was so encouraging to hear this morning that because God is who He is and that He loves us He makes things new. The Bible talks about how God makes us new. We have the promise of not only a new life in Christ on this earth, but new life in Christ when we die. 

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come The old has gone, the new is here! 

2nd Corinthians 5:17

So many times as Christians, especially as women we forget that we have been created new in Christ. We have new beginnings. As women sometimes, we tend to dwell on our "imperfections," the things in our lives that are unbecoming that we don't take pride in. While it is important to be repentant of our sins we tend to think less of ourselves. We hide who we truly are.  Ladies, you are beautiful on the inside and outside. God has a special plan for your life. He plans to use your flaws, imperfections, and things that you just don't like about yourself. He desires to take the the hurts and bruises from life and turn them into a beautiful masterpiece if we will only will trust Him with out. 

You see stout woman aren't afraid to be made into new beautiful masterpieces. They aren't afraid to be vulnerable before their Lord.  I think of the story of the woman at the well. This Samaritan woman is a perfect example of how Christ makes things new. Let me "sarahpharse" the story. Jesus and his disciples had been out ministering to others and sharing the Good News. They stopped in Samaria. To the Jews, Samaria was where "those people, those sinners" lived. The disciples went into town and Jesus waited at the well. This woman (one of those people) came to draw some water and Jesus asked for some. She knew that Jesus was a Jew and Jews didn't talk with her "kind." Long story short Jesus shared with her how he could change her life. That He and only He could take away her sins and make her new. I believe Jesus was also saying to this woman, "be My daughter, be the daughter of The King, let me make you new, let me take your imperfections, your "beauty flaws" and your hurts and make you into a beautiful masterpiece.  Now I know that not all of our stories are just like hers. But we just like are filled with our own hidden sins, flaws, and hurts and we just liked that woman need to answer Christ's call...to be the daughter of a King. 

For you created my inmost being you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,  I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body;    all the days ordained for me were written in your book    before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them,they would outnumber the grains of sands when I awake, I am still with you.

Psalms 139:13-18